Principles- self-deception – 16/4/2016

   I talked in the former article about “Sorts of deceit or trickery” that people may exercise: misleading ideas, emotional deceit or dishonest behaviors and that all religions forbid. Moreover, deceit can’t last or work forever as it is the way to lose everything. Today I will talk about the hardest sort of deceit which is self-deception.

   They say there is nothing harder than self deception. When we discuss deceit, we should begin with what is inside first. A man should be aware whether his self is deceiving him, which is harder, or others. The American novelist and philosopher Michael Novac said that there are no limited boundaries to man’s ability to deceive himself! Many times man’s desire controls his ideas and feelings in the opposite direction of the real situation and his true abilities. It may push him to trust dishonest or unqualified persons. This sort of deceit results in, whether man discovers it or not, pushing the person to take the wrong direction in his life and not using his real abilities or talents that he was gifted by God. As a result, his steps may stumble or he may continue trusting deceitful people. The most dangerous sort of self-deceit is the person who had a firm belief that he is always right refusing any kind of criticism or advice. He always wishes that people see him the way he sees himself and that they should agree completely on what he thinks. In return, he becomes so angry when someone disagrees with him or gives him an advice or a comment.

   Man deceives himself when he recognizes that he is walking in the wrong path of life yet continues walking it without trying to correct his way. He may also trust a person and trust him blindly without resorting to logic as he doesn’t want anything but to put his trust in that person.

   He may also deceive himself furthermore when he justifies his actions to get away from holding responsibility by laying it on other persons or circumstances refusing to bear the consequences himself.  

   The end of that man will be destructive for him and for his closed ones.He would never discover his great abilities or appreciate them as he will keep convincing himself that he doesn’t have any, thus he would never know where the path of success goes. He may also refuse honest advices that may save him from stumbles of life.

To recover from self-deception, here are, dear reader, some advices:

• Sometimes try to evaluate your ideas and behaviors in the light of good values and principles without resorting to justifications.

• Think about any criticism you get and discuss it with yourself and with those whom you trust in their love and honesty.

• They say, use your mind to solve your issues and your heart to solve others’. Don’t neglect your mind and put your emotions in control as they are easily deceivable, at the same time you must be peaceful and satisfied with the decisions you reach. Don’t haste to take actions or decisions, it will just be a new mistake and don’t be too slow or you will resort to deceitful justifications and will lose the enthusiasm needed to correct your path.

   Having honest and wise people in your life is a great advantage that you should use. You should have a constructive discussion with them from time to time…to be continued

Anba Ermiah,
General Bishop& President of the Coptic Orthodox Cultural Center