On Life 86 – Negligence – July 24, 2015

   He was quite perplexed. He got pretty angry with a friend of his and spoke ill of him. Yet, as he cooled down, he regretted what he had said. He kept asking himself if he should forgive him, or this is the end of their relation.

   Hard times are part and parcel of our lives. They might pass peacefully or frenetically. Yet, we should acquire some wisdom in order to overcome crises.

   Some people say, “Ignore certain things: for not everything is worth attention.” Opinions vary regarding negligence for some believe it is an “elegant revenge”, while others believe it is “brutality”. Bernard Shaw says, “Hatred is no big evil, but negligence is brutality incarnate.” Others think that negligence is a call to others to let go. Among those is Plato who says, “When someone changes the way he treats you, be sure he wants you to let go.” On the other hand, Shakespeare believes that negligence expresses how important you are to someone. Other sages think that it is the best treatment for some people who we encounter, or that it is half way through happiness. They say, “Go as if you’ve heard nothing. Speak not as if you’ve understood nothing; ignore as if you’ve seen nothing, and forget as if you’ve remembered nothing. This is half way through happiness.”

   It is said that life needs negligence: ignore incidents, people, and deeds: for not everything deserves your attention. Yet, the question is: who should one ignore? What should one ignore? There is only one answer: Situations, not people, should be ignored. How hard it is to ignore someone angry, happy, pained, or perplexed! Negligence applies to situations that you might travel safely through life.

   What should one ignore? You can ignore what people say in anger, while giving them your attention. When they cool down, you will have offered them the help they need. Likewise, you can ignore the obstacles that you encounter by striving to overcome them and achieve your goals. If you focus solely on difficulties, you lose hope in resuming your journey. On the other hand, if you focus on your objectives and persevere, you will achieve unimagined success. Here, one recalls Pope Shenouda III’s words, “Never say, ‘God, I have great troubles. Say, ‘Troubles! God is great”

   Ignore devastating criticism which aims at destroying and distracting you. Rather, be attentive to edifying criticism which will help you correct your actions. Ignoring a good piece of advice, even if it is against your will, is vanity which will lead you to the abyss. In fact, “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.”

General Bishop

Head of the Coptic Orthodox Cultural Center